Stop Judging

When an autistic child is acting up in public, it is easy for others to judge. It is easy to think that a parent is ineffective, especially when the child shows no sign of physical disability and looks like a "normal" kid. I shudder to think what was going through people's minds as we walked through town yesterday.  I'm sure we look like we'd be great fodder for a channel 4 documentary about dysfunctional families.

So here are a few things I'd like to say to people who judge:

You are an ignorant bunch and should really educate yourselves about autism before you decide how we should "handle" it.

Firstly, many autistic kids have sensory difficulties which present a skewed view of the world. Lights can be intensely bright, sounds can be deafening, smells overpowering and tastes too strong. Something as simple as someone brushing past can feel like a punch in the arm. Clothing can feel scratchy and uncomfortable. Daily life is like being bombarded with a million sensations all at once. Imagine walking around with a fire engine siren blaring in your ear or a horrible cheesy smell in your nostrils that you can't shake off, whilst your clothes feel like sandpaper in your skin? Not very pleasant, is it?

Secondly, autistic kids can struggle to communicate. They know how they feel, but putting it calmly into words can be an issue. Replies can be rude, brusque and thoughtless, but the child may not understand what they have done or said to offend the other person. Kids with autism can lack empathy because they simply cannot comprehend how it feels to be in another person's shoes. This can lead to huge social difficulties and misunderstandings. Frustration at not being able to put something into words may spill over into physical actions, like hitting and banging.

Thirdly, autistic kids can feel anxious ALL of the time. You know how you feel when you are dreading something, or feeling like the next thing that happens will be the straw that breaks the camel's back? Well autistic kids can feel like that constantly. Having a high state of anxiety, even very simple things can tip them over the edge and cause them to freak out in public.

So now you know a bit more about autism. In a perfect world I wouldn't have to be explaining myself, but we live in a world full of ignorant folk and if I can enlighten just one of them then I have made life a little better for autistic kids and their parents everywhere.